I ain't dead. I'm just having a writer's block or something.
Not that I've been much of a writer before... :)
Try this:
More deleted humour from Wikipedia:
If you succeed in tipping a cow only partway, such that only one of its feet is still on the ground, you have created lean beef. Such a feat is well done. Naturally, being outside, the cow is unstable. When it falls over, it becomes ground beef.
More thoughts on Gaiman.. I think everyone, especially anyone who has the slightest interest in literature, should read Snow, Glass, Apples. It's Gaiman's take on the fairy tale of Snow White, told from the point of view of the stepmother. It can really make you wonder how much of what we hear is actually just one side of the whole story, tinted by the rose-coloured glasses of the one telling the tale...
Also, if you like good novels, Gaiman's novel collection Smoke & Mirrors is a must read.
I'm starting to sound like a fanboy...
As I'm unable to produce any profound thoughts of my own, I turn to the insights of others. A passage from Neil Gaiman's "Anansi Boys":
It is a small world. You don't have to live in it particularly long to learn that for yourself. There is a theory that, in the whole world, there are only five hundred real people (the cast, as it were. All the rest of the people in the world, the theory suggests, are extras), and what is more, they all know each other. And it's true, or true as far as it goes. In reality the world is made of thousands upon thousands of groups of about five hundred people, all of whom will spend their lives bumping into each other, trying to avoid each other, and discovering each other in the same unlikely teashop in Vancouver. There is an unavoidability to this process. It's not even coincidence. It's just the way the world works, with no regards for individuals or for propriety.
Still slinking off work. Found a funny limerick, deleted from Wikipedia
There once was a man from Nantucket,
Whose dick was so long, he could suck it.
As he wiped off his chin,
he said with a grin:
"If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it!"
Dull day at work.. Found funny euphemisms/dysphemisms from Wikipedia:
Last night we were watching the Eurovision Song Contest from a big screen in the Virgin Oil Club in Helsinki. Just before the show began I wanted to go and get some drinks that would last me for pretty much the whole show, since the place was packed and moving from the table during the show was pretty difficult. The original idea was to buy a pitcher of Sangria or Margaritas to the table, but they didn't do any pitchers. So, I then bought a large cider and a long cocktail I asked the bartender to whip up for me. The bartender quickly, almost without thinking, went for some Sour Apple liqueur, vodka, apple juice and soda and stirred it all up in a pint with some ice.
Just today Darcy O'Neil over at The Art of Drink posted about making drinks off the cuff when a client asks for "something special". He said that he relishes the challenge, while some bartenders grunt and go for their "go to" cocktail that they whip up anytime someone asks them to make a random cocktail. In my experience, a lot of bartenders fall into the latter group, as the guy behind the bar in Virgin Oil last night probably did. But occasionally I run into a bartender who seems to enjoy the task and seems to make something up on the fly. For some reason these seem to be mostly on the ferry from Helsinki to Stockholm... :)
Today I wanted to make myself a refreshing cocktail, but since my liquor cabinet is pretty limited at the moment, I couldn't find anything to make (that I liked) with my limited supply. So, I decided to try something of my own. To keep it simple, I just went with 4cl of whisky (JW Swing) and 2dl of orange juice, shaken with some ice. Pretty simple, but nothing spectacular. A "Screwdriver" (vodka and orange juice) is better.. Howsabout I call this a "Maltdriver"?
A ex and a 1 were walking down the street, when they saw a derivative approaching. “Help! It'll eat me!” exclaimed the 1 and ran to hide. The ex, not afraid of the approaching derivative stepped forward in its path and declared “I am ex, you cannot hurt me!” The derivative, slightly amused, replied “Nice to meet you. I am a derivative, with respect to y.”
Meh. I've got a flu or a cold or something. It feels like my head weighs a ton and my ears get "locked up" (is it called that in English?). I've also got a slight headache. Me no likey.
Well, at least I learned something new from this too. From Wikipedia:
The best way to blow the nose is keeping both nasal openings open when blowing and wiping rather than fully covering them, permitting pressure to partially dissipate. Doing so will reduce the pressure that would otherwise drive into the ears or sinuses.
Bleh. I hate statistics. I just had an exam on statistical testing, correlation, regression, variance analysis etc. I really can't say that it went well, but I hope I can just manage to pass.
I also can't really say that I gave it all I could, since I didn't study all that well... It's just that the subject is so BORING! Every time I tried to read, my mind started to wander and I soon found myself thinking about building eggshell-carving robots, improving my Ultimate game or about the wonderfuld properties of the cup of dark-roast coffee that I was sipping...
I sometimes wonder if I have AD(H)D, or if the problem is just my lack of discipline. Is there a test for that?
So much to do, so little time... Isn't that always the case? Why is it that you always feel that you don't have as much time as you'd like to do things you want, and later on, when you look back, it turns out that you have even less time then.
Here are some things I'd like to do this summer, or at least get started:
I think these were our first drinks on the trip to Stockholm in March. I'll probably be posting about some drinks too, since I've become interested in mixology again.
What do I mean, again? Well.. Something like four years ago, I got interested in cocktails. I got a book of cocktail recipes, some liquors, and Saara bought me a shaker and a jigger as a birthday present. For some reason I never got around to actually making a single drink before losing interest. I even gave the recipe book to my brother...
Since then I've grown fond of whiskies (at the moment I've got four bottles in my liquor cabinet: Johnnie Walker Green Label, Glenfiddich Solera Reserve 15yo, Bowmore Enigma 12yo and Johnnie Walker Swing) and wines (mostly red and sparkling wines, got some whites too). But lately I've regained my interest in cocktails and have actually used the shaker to make a couple of them. I'll post some recipes later, maybe even with pictures.
The title of this blog is a pun I came up with, some time ago. Let me know if you don't get it :)
Anyway, it seems I'm not the only one to get that idea. A quick Google search finds 192 hits for the phrase. I guess I'll have to be more original in the future :D
Well, I'm back.
This is maybe my 3rd or 4th attempt at a blog. Even more, if you count my early web pages, which I used to have in a blog-like format, before blogs were even invented. Not that I ever posted regularly... I've tried many times, but for some reason I've always fallen flat on my face, probably because I've always been way too ambitious. I've tried to write longer articles and intelligent posts, and have always gotten bored before my first month is up.
The only time I've actually had a longer blog going was for my bass building project, and I didn't even finish that one. Well, I haven't technically finished the bass yet either, there are still a couple of small things to do, but the bass blog is way more incomplete than the bass, which is actually playable at the moment.
So, this time around, I've given myself permission to post short thoughts, random photos and video clips I snap with my N73, and especially bad jokes. Actually the main raison d'être of this blog is to be an outlet for my constant flow of really bad jokes and puns, so that I don't have to tell them all to Saara. OK, she'll probably be reading this blog anyway, so she'll have to read them here... :)
So, let's see how long I manage this time :)
